Am I weak?

by In Transition Working Girl

I have been dying to write about this for over a week and would like to pose a question to all of you Working Girls. But first, let me set up the situation for you.

Recently, I was given the opportunity to go to lunch with two of my co-workers. The first is someone who, I think, finds a reason to yell at me on a weekly basis and the second, is the person I replaced. It was sort of an odd lunch, but the person who always yells at me thought it might be nice to get to know the "old me" since we are around the same age. It was really great, the "old me" and I hit it off right away.

After the get-to-know-you conversations, the conversation quickly turned to how my boss is non-confrontational and how the person who yells thinks being non-confrontational is a sign of weakness. I stopped in my tracks, this is why I get yelled at! This had me thinking all week, since I would rather talk through the issue, this makes me weak? What do you think?

I think that in the workplace there are many different styles of management and dealing with issues in a confrontational manner can only escalate the situation. To me the word confrontation has negative a very connotation. I would rather talk through the issue, let both people state their point of view and come to a resolution. I do understand that there are people who run from any sort of confrontation, but that does not make them weak, it just means they need to be communicated to in a different way.

What are your thoughts on this issue?

Where did my confidence go?

by In Transition Working Girl

Two months.

This is how long its taken to lose all confidence I had going into my new job. I have lost it all-I feel completely lost and helpless. I feel like I know nothing and everything that I have ever learned has been stripped away from me, literally.

When I made my move a few months ago, I went in feeling so confident and ready to prove myself. I had set goals and expectations of myself and now I find myself feeling weak and powerless. I feel I can't do anything right and everyone is sitting back watching me flail, even perhaps getting some satisfaction out of it.

I have tried to pinpoint whats happening and have some general thoughts. Mainly though they all related back to no one training me or showing me historically how things have been done and then criticizing and making me feel bad when I step up on my own and fail.

Its been a rough transition. Now I know that there is always a learning curve, but making me feel stupid should not be a part of it. This is a major confidence downer. The three former working girls whose job I took over were not here to train me when I started so its my own ball game, starring ME! Which in some regards is a positive because I get to create my own program.

I had a pep talk with my father last weekend and his advice was of course to stay positive (don't let the gremlins get you down), but also learn the people's soft spot who are making me feel bad and learn (not necessarily "be") to be friendly with them. Everyone has them and I need to make it my mission to break the wall down.

How have you handled new job transitions and confidence busters?

Picking the Long Distance Route

by In Transition Working Girl

Happy week of love! Or, in my case, happy reminder that the one I love lives three hours away.

I am going to let you in a little more on my personal life. For three and a half years I have been in a serious committed relationship and feel he is the One for me. Right now, we are in a long distance relationship.

A little history, the first six months we were together, we were apart. But then his job brought him to the area in which I live so it worked out perfectly. For the last three years, we have pretty much been attached at the hip, enjoying our quite evenings in and weekends together.

About a year ago, I started feeling restless in my career and wanted a change. I went through several stages of thinking I knew what I wanted to do. At the end of the day, I realized to accomplish what I really wanted in my career, I would have to move, affecting us both. Being a planner by nature, moving was always "our" plan, but not for a few more years so I was to blame for this change.

My boyfriend played a super supportive role at first. But after a few months of talking about the possibility of me moving, he suddenly wasn't so supportive and our relationship took some hits. I found out he was confiding in others about his frustrations over me wanting to move. It all was difficult for me to deal with, especially while trying to make a career change. It all came to a head on the weekend I was offered the first of my two job offers. We had hours of long conversations and lots of crying trying to figure out what was best for us personally and professionally.

Throughout the conversation we pin-pointed many things, but it came down to one word we both wanted to avoid, resentment.

We are both young, motivated and focused on our careers. We both feel the need to excel and push our limits now but also selfishly wanted the other one to be right by our side. However, we realized that by not letting the other one fly, they would resent the other one later on and would have far worse implications on our relationship. And that was how we decided long distance was better for us in the short term. We did make a promise, as I am sure all couples do, but our relationship is first and if changes need to be made, they will.

We put a plan in place to be together. And, fingers crossed, by the end of the year, I will not only have my career, but my man back too.

How have you handled long distance relationships? Any tips for this Working Girl?

(Image via)

I'll Cry If I Want to...

by In Transition Working Girl

This week has been trying and stressful; and there were several moments where I wanted to burst out crying in the office. Yes, I am going to admit it on Working Girl, I am an emotional person. There was even a point in the week when an old friend called to get an update and I just explained I couldn't talk work stuff because I was at work and I didn't want to have a break down. Let me just say this, moving and starting a new job has been beyond stressful.

This got me thinking though, how many of you have cried in the workplace? Seen a colleague cry? And how do you handle it?

Stress is my major point of weakness when it comes to wanting to burst out into tears. It may be long hours or a pending deadline that goes off track, but crying is a source of release for me. In the beginning of my Working Girl career, managing this kind of stress was so new to me that it lead to many crying sessions and more than I would care to admit. However over the last several years I have gotten better about managing this stress and have learned how awful it really is to cry in front of my colleagues and bosses. I makes me feel weak and less respected, so now I avoid it all costs.

For me, learning to manage my tears has come with time and I know there is still lots to learn when it comes to stress management. Here are several things that I do:

• Take a short 5-10 min walk
• Take a coffee or lunch break
• Do something personal (check email or Facebook) to clear my mind off of work
• Walk outside and make a phone call
• Make a to do list to map out how I am going to get everything done
• Take deep breaths
• Turn on my iPod for a little bit

One thing I learned not to do unless I have a friend working with me that I trust, is to go crying to a colleague. If my tears are about to come when I am talking to someone, I quickly end the conversation and head for a private location.

Now reversing roles, what do you do if its someone else who is shedding tears? When this happens to me, my number one thought is get them out of sight of everyone else who might be able to see that they are crying. I usually suggest we get out of the office to continue to address what is going on. Then from there I make sure they know I am there for them and this session will be between us only. If its stress I try to unburden them and see what I can do to take a load from them, otherwise I just listen and try to be a good listener-and that's all.

What are some other tips and suggestions to manage your tears in the work place?

Being Sick in the Workplace

by In Transition Working Girl

I am in week two of my new job, I am loving every minute of it and my workaholic ways have returned. I have already turned in several 11+hr days and am so happy to be stimulated again!

That being said as I was filling out my new hire information and learning about the work policies, it got me thinking about sick time and how to handle it, so I thought I would open the discussion up on Working Girl. How do you handle being a working girl and getting sick? Do you call in? try to pull through?

In my opinion there are really two schools of thought. One, you call in the moment you aren't feeling well or two, you show up to work until someone notices how sick you are and sends you home. I feel from my experiences rarely is there a third when its somewhere in between.

For me personally I am guilty of working until I get sent home. I feel there are so many people in the work place that take sick days often and without merit many times, but I want my employers to KNOW I am sick. Bad thinking? For me I feel it shows dedication to my employer and they know that if there ever is a day where I am sicker than a dog-I must be telling the truth! Is seeing really believing? Its a little weird to be forced to go home, mentally it makes me feel better having them acknowledge it rather then question me.

On the flip side though, I know that I get annoyed when people come in coughing all over me so if I am really not feeling well I try to let my boss get the hint early in the day.

This is just how I personally handle the situation-What is your take on sick days? Do you call in or wait to be sent home?

A New Year and a New Goal

By In Transition Working Girl

Happy New Year Working Girls. I hope you enjoyed the last several weeks as much as I have, although I am ready to get 2011 started. How about you? Its my last week at my old job and part of me still feels like its 2010, come next Monday though when I walk into my new job, 2011 will be officially here in my book.

Because of the all the craziness of the holidays, combined with a pending move, I hadn't really thought about New Years resolutions until this week. A few days, late, but oh well. Since I spent most of last year trying to figure out what the next steps were for me professionally, this years goals are simple. I have one and its to spend the next year pouring myself into work. For me this means that my new job is numero uno and everything else for the next 365 falls after.

When thinking back about what was missing from my life in 2010 and how out of balance it was, it was clearly the professionally aspect that had everything out of whack. So looking forward now that I have my dream job in hand I want to do everything to prove who I am, to not only to my new employer but to myself.

Just saying I am going to pour myself into my job is not enough and hard to measure results, so here are just a few of the things that I am going to do to attain this goal:

• Attend networking events (2-3 times a month)
• Arrive before and leave after my boss
• Bring in new clients, which is not something I am tasked with, but feel its is important for my new company
• Obtain additional education certificates/or attend trainings
• Become the "expert" on something in my new company

So there you have it, while "pouring myself into work" isn't the prettiest goal, for me its everything I didn't have in 2010 and can't wait for in 2011.

"Get Introduced" to LinkedIn

Last week Social Media Working Girl wrote about how to use social networking to find a job. Read her post here. It was full of great information and having just attended a professional coaching session where there was a section on LinkedIn, I thought I would expand on why its so great when trying to find a new job. Prior to this coaching session, I thought I understood LinkedIn, but its functionality is beyond that of just looking people up and viewing their profile.

Here is my version of getting introduced to LinkedIn:

When networking there are really three different levels of people you know and are trying to network with:

• Inner circle: those you already know


• Middle circle: the people those people know


• Outer circle: the people the middle people know

So when looking on LinkedIn they conveniently have a system that mirrors a network with letting you know who is your 1st connection (inner circle), 2nd connection (middle circle), and 3rd connection/everyone else (outer circle).

Now that you can see through the networking system on LinkedIn, its time show you how to virtually network.

1. Search for someone you are looking for specifically or look at one of your 1st connection contacts who has contacts you are interested in meeting


2. If you are doing a search for a person, notice what level of connection you are with the person. 1st, 2nd, or 3rd? If you are looking at a 1st connections page and connections, notice if the person you are looking at knows any additional contacts.


3. Now on to the important part, on the right, there will be a "Get introduced to a connection" button. Click this and it will bring up the connections you have in common. Select a contact.


4. Here is the important part, the introduction. There will be two sections for you to write in, one for the person you are hoping to meet and the other for the person you already know. Ask the person you already know if it would be okay if he/she introduced you. Once both sections are filled out with messages to both, it will email your contact asking for the introduction. All that person does is accept and then the email you wrote to the connection you are hoping to make will be sent to them. Easy as that!

Some of the other tips that this coach gave were to make sure your profile is at least 90% complete and be sure to add a summary. It won't look very good it its only half filled out!

I hope this helps some of you in your job serach as we get ready to enter the new year. Hope you all are having a Happy Holiday season!

In Transition Working Girl

In Transition No More

Guess what working girls? I am no longer in transition!

I can hardly believe it. Just last week I was writing about my frustrations and this week I received a formal job offer, accepted and resigned. My new position is exactly what I have been looking for and meets my goals and objectives and then some. The position is at a marketing agency and I couldn't be more thrilled. Plus my new company is woman owned-how cool is that!?!

Being in transition has been a long process and I want to give others hope that even in this economy there are jobs out there and they pop up when you least expect it. I started this process about a year ago when I realized I wasn't happy. Then spent most of the spring time telling others I was going to start looking, then summer rolled around and I finally told myself I was ready and then this fall I actually put the wheels in motion.

As I have mentioned I am a huge fan of networking so began the process of reaching out to others, asking to meet them and get introduced to their friends. And it worked! This is actually the second job offer I received as I turned the first one down and both were contacts of a contact of mine.

I look forward to sharing more about my current job and my new one!

So working girls, I am going to leave you with this: network, network, network.

Have a wonderful Thursday!

"No Longer" In Transition Working Girl

Why am I In Transition Working Girl?

I know to this point I have been rather vague as to why I am in transition. I apologize about this as I mentioned when I first started blogging, I felt until I moved on it was best to keep these details on the DL for obvious reasons. I am looking forward to the day when I can share all the amazing stories (being sarcastic) regarding my current position as I think many of you will be able to relate to me.

However, this week has been especially challenging for me professionally and I wanted to share with you more of the "why" I am in transition. There are many events that have lead me to where I am. It's been roughly a years worth of frustrations that have lead me to being in transition. Mainly there are two things that when I pinpoint my unhappiness seem to be common themes. Are you ready for them. Lack of direction and poor leadership.

How many of you working girls have the same frustrations?

In terms of lack of direction, I feel there is no vision for where the company I work for is headed. It seems to have all these ideas, but no idea how to accomplish them, thus the wheels are spinning and no movement forward occurs. It's as though the company I work for is in the same spot it was when I joined, perhaps even going backwards. We have nothing that we can say we have done or accomplished. Since I am a goal oriented person, this has been eating away at me. I feel I express my thoughts on goal setting only to get shut down.

The second item, poor leadership, is a tough nut for me to swallow. This is because my boss is actually a really nice person, but does not posses the knowledge for the position they are in. Integrity is very questionable and, last but not least, motivation to focus on company items is minimal.

As you can see I am frustrated. At first I thought maybe I was the only one seeing this, but recently a door opened and someone else let me in that they are feeling the same way. I feel very lucky to have the position I do right now, but the more frustrated I get, the more it motivates me to work on the next opportunity, which I hope happens sooner than later.

So what are some of the reasons that have lead you to be in transition either now or in the past?

Office Parties

The holidays are just around the corner, and you know what that means working girls...office parties! This is always one of those times of year when people at work come out of their shell and let loose.

I have worked at companies big and small-and they have held parties to that matter as well. My most memorable holiday party though is from my first job out of college. Its not a story of someone hooking up with someone else or dancing on the table, no a superior got a freshly cooked platter of fish (juices and all) spilled on him from an Italian place. He was one of those people that just took it in stride and laughed it off with the rest of us. The rest of the night he smelled pretty fishy though! Guess you had to be there to think it was funny. Poor guy! :)

What is your funniest office holiday story?

Here is a little "how to" guide on how to not embarrass yourself at this years company party. Click the picture to see it larger.

To Pay back or Not to Pay Back?

Happy Thanksgiving!

I hope you all are enjoying your day and have plans to eat lots of yummy food today. I can't believe it, but I am cooking my first thanksgiving meal EVER today. Wish me luck! Are any of you cooking your first one EVER too?

During this last week leading up to Thanksgiving, I have been giving a lot of thought about giving. Giving as it relates to many things but mainly when you are the beneficiary. Fellow working girls, I am talking about being on the receiving end in these tough times with so many unemployed or working paycheck to paycheck. It may be a loan from your parents or other financially well-off family members. The question I would like to pose is: How should we handle this: take it and be grateful OR pay it back?

I will start by letting you all know that I have borrowed money from my family before so this is something that I can relate to. My personal belief is that no matter how big or small the amount you should always pay it back, even if it is from the Bank of Mom and Dad or a wealthy Aunt.

Yes, I know that times are tough, and yes finding a job right now is even tougher. Our families are here to love and support us and have given us the tools to succeed. All too often I think people rely too much on these handouts. They don't understand that there is more to it than just paying back the money. It's about trust and showing those who we have borrowed from that we mean business, are motivated and understand this is their hard earned money, not ours for the taking.

An example of this is when my parents, who were young and in love, wanted to buy their first house. They borrowed a significant amount from my grandparents. At the time, my grandfather reluctantly said soemthing along the lines of "those kids will never pay us back". Well a few years later my parents paid back every penny they borrowed, much to the shock of my grandfather of course. But there was a trust built that if they ever needed to borrow money again my grandparents would be there to help out.

For me personally, I want to show my family that, yes I needed the money, but now I am ready to pay you back and show you I am a responsible hard working person. I know that if I am ever in a situation again where I need money, they will be more than willing to let me borrow it again because they know that I will pay them back. Again it's their money, not mine. It is simply a loan.

All too often I think young people rely on money flowing their way when times get tough. However, family members that continiously give money without ever expecting anything back are just enabling the situation. Sure we all go through hard times, but the more honest we can be with ourselves and pay back what we borrow, the less sticky everything gets.

So my advice is, borrow what you need and come up with a payment plan to pay back what you owe. Once you write that last payback check, walk away and hold your head high knowing that if you ever need to borrow money again, someone will have your back.

What is your take on this situation? To pay back or not to pay back?

Fitness in the Work Place

I grew up doing every sport imaginable. You name it, I probably did it. When I got to high school it got worse because there were times when I was doubling up on sports along with going to school. Then college started and I was burnt out on fitness and the thought of setting foot in a gym to get my workouts seemed so foreign. So I took the proper measures and avoided the gym most of college. Then I got my first working girl job and became so focused on proving myself in the workplace, once again my fitness lacked big time. Sure there were short stints of working out, but they were short-lived and I returned to hitting the snooze button in exchange for an extra half hour of sleep before work. This continued until last year when I stepped on the scale and realized my weight was quickly creeping up and my stress levels at work were going through the roof. While I was still within a normal weight range, I was not satisfied that my clothes didn’t fit properly.

So I made the decision to do something about it and stop making excuses. It’s now been a year and I feel amazing. I can even slip into those skinny jeans from college that I am sad to admit I held on to that long. What worked for me may not work for you so I will spare you the details of my many hours at the gym and focus more on finding the balance between my overachieving working girl habits and fitness.

Looking back, I realized it was essentially a time management issue that was causing everything to seem unmanageable and daunting. Yes, there have been trade-offs but now I am more efficient at work and throughout my day. My body understands the importance of exercising and actual craves it.

I started with baby steps and found a hole here and there that worked for my schedule. Soon I was actually taking 30 minutes at lunch to go for a quick run rather than working through lunch. Now I am actually one that gets up prior to work to go to the gym just because I realize how much of a difference it really makes in my day. There are days that I take off from the gym, but I feel so lethargic at work and the day usually drags on.

The other aspect of my fitness was what I was consuming when I was at work. I am a stress eater so the less I worked out, the more stressed I was and as a result the more food I ate. I have read about logging your food and started doing this as well. My plan wasn’t to be obsessed with logging what I ate, but to become familiar with what I was eating. I was shocked to realize I was eating meals that a 200lb man should be consuming. As a result I started packing lunches and bringing snacks to keep me full throughout the day and avoiding the cookie shop down the street.

A year later with the fitness and nutrition goals being met, at work I feel more on top of my game and have that balance that I used to crave.

To further the discussion on how fitness really does lay a role at work, I was flipping through the November Women’s Health and came across this article and wanted to share it with you. The article gives some validity to what people have been saying for years, working out makes you better at work.

Professional Skill/Attitude Improvement Compared With A Day You Don't Exercise:

• Motivation 32%
• Time management 28%
• Concentration 26%
• Stress management 26%
• Productivity 25%
• Accuracy 15%

*Taken from Women’s Health Magazine

Labeled

Being an In Transition Work Girl has provided some eye-opening moments for me. There have been several to date, but the biggest one seems to be how I am labeled. I am proud of who I am and what I have accomplished since I graduated college, but there is one little label that seems to be holding me back.

What is it? I am being labeled based on the industry I am in rather than my skill set/degree. I have to admit, I feel a bit stuck. My background is in marketing and I have held various positions within both agencies and industries. However, the one thing that seems to keep defining me is the industry I am currently in. I might add I have held this position for only two years and it sticks out like a sore thumb.

Am I the only working girl facing this problem?

Here is an example: A few weeks ago I contacted a friend who works at a big company in the city where I hope to relocate to see if she knew of any openings. Given that her company is one of the fastest growing in the world, she immediately sent me the postings for the area of the company that fits my current industry. I felt helpless because how am I supposed to say thank you for your help, but you have it all wrong.

When I accepted the position I am in currently, it was because the word “marketing” was attached to my role. I viewed the position based on what I would be marketing not because I loved the industry. There are many that would probably see the industry I am in as amazing, but I just don’t have the passion for it at this point in my life. I am young and crave more of a corporate environment.

So over the last several weeks, I have tried to put on my thinking cap and figure out how to market myself. I am trying to overcome this label that has me pigeonholed and I see as a major road block for the next step in my career.

What are some of the labels you are experiencing as a working girl that you would rather get rid of?

What Are Your Strengths?

I was helping my best friend earlier this week as she prepared for her bi-yearly review. One of the questions on her questionnaire was, what are your strengths? She was struggling with what to write. I don’t blame her…that is such a tough question to answer without sounding like you are gloating so I shared with her this amazing little book called StrengthsFinder 2.0. Have any of you read this book?

I was lucky enough to stumble across this book about 4 years ago when I was interviewing for a position where it was required of all candidates. Initially I thought it was just another test, but as I read through the first few chapters, I realized how much validity it really had. The book talks about strengthening your strengths rather then trying to strengthen your weaknesses. It makes so much sense. There are 34 unique strengths, all of which are great!

It’s a short read. You take the test (code in the book), it gives you your top five strengths and then you get to read in detail about them. It was scary how spot on the test was for me! So now when I get asked this question, I am able to talk with confidence.

If you have time, I really recommend it!

Here are my top five strengths in no particular order:

Responsibility-People who are especially talented in the Responsibility theme take psychological ownership of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and loyalty.

Discipline-People who are especially talented in the Discipline theme enjoy routine and structure. Their world is best described by the order they create.

Arranger-People who are especially talented in the Arranger theme can organize, but they also have a flexibility that complements this ability. They like to figure out how all of the pieces and resources can be arranged for maximum productivity.

Achiever-People who are especially talented in the Achiever theme have a great deal of stamina and work hard. They take great satisfaction from being busy and productive.

Futuristic-People who are especially talented in the Futuristic theme are inspired by the future and what could be. They inspire others with their visions of the future.

Tough Times, Tough Measures

I know the economy has affected us all, gone are the days of shopping over lunch and manicure Fridays. Sigh. However, as a working girl on a budget, it’s an interesting balance to still look good and watch your pennies. This is a great article about all the things you shouldn’t save money on. Some of the things on the list made me laugh, but when I got to thinking about how the economy has affected my wallet, there are some things that I have sacrificed and others that I would rather skip a meal for then go without.

What are things you can’t live without? What are things you pass on as a working girl?

Here is my list…and yes, I am posting it here for you to see. Since I have been a working girl on a budget and most of these have become more of a lifestyle change for me, I had to really think about what I have changed since the market crashed…

Can’t Live Without

Hair Cut/Color-With two stories of botched cuts and bad highlights, I will sacrifice just about anything for a good cut/color. Last year I tried dying my hair back to my natural color so I could save money. The result was beyond awful…a few months later when I went back to highlight, even my boss commented on how happy I was.

Gym/Yoga Membership-For some, this probably is in the do without, but over the course of the last 9 months I have learned to appreciate the importance of fitness in the workplace. It keeps both my stress levels from work and my waist intact. Tip: One of my girlfriends was able to negotiate her gym membership way down. Have you?

Groceries-You may laugh at this, but it’s something I take very seriously. No more care free meal planning or trips to Whole Pay Check Foods. Now I make a point of spending a little more at the store to get the most out of my grocery budget with things that I like and will last me awhile.

Maybe…I Try to Practice Self Control

Clothes-This is a tough one. Every girl makes sacrifices, and in this economy, this one has taken a nose dive. I have learned to control my impulse purchases, and focus more on essentials.

Shoes-I love shoes, but have learned to spend a little more on nicer shoes that will go farther than lots of shoes that hurt my feet. Am I getting old?

Magazines- I love a good gossip magazine, but my subscriptions went out the door about two years ago. However, that being said, there are a few business related magazines, that my father and I share subscriptions on.

Out the Door

Dry Cleaning-I made the choice to start wearing less of my dry clean only clothes when the market turned. As a result I found cute stuff in the back of my closet that I can wash anytime.

Manicures/Pedicures- I still love get mani/pedi’s but, with some practice, I have become pretty good at painting my own nails.

Lunches Out-When the economy started crashing, this was the first to go. When I really sat down to look at my spending habits this was a major chunk. Now I pack yummy lunches and can’t wait for noon to roll around.

Starbucks Habit-This working girl loves a Grande Chai Latte, but same as lunches, this is a luxury I can do without. I was able to kick a bad habit and save money. I also love Good Earth Tea, a little milk and honey, and I am good to go.

Happy Hour-Happy hour with co-workers/friends is such a fun way of getting together, but also a huge waste of money. There is always that one co-worker who slides out the door without paying, leaving the rest of us to pick up the tab. Tip: One of my friends makes a point of hosting happy hour at her place as a way of saving money. She is one smart cookie.

Parking-Whether it’s for work or personal reasons, when I am out, I refuse to pay for parking. Even if I have to walk a mile. Plus walking the little extra to my destination helps me burn a few more calories.

My list could go on forever, but I think these are the essentials…what are yours?

My Best Kept Secret

What is your best kept secret?

Well, mine is networking. At least it has been to date. This secret has landed me all three of my jobs . I am sure hoping it works its magic again, cross your fingers. I have found in the past that my network is working for me even when I am not in transition. It really amazes me.

At some point in college, someone told me I should start networking. Little did I know then, that was probably the best advice anyone ever gave me. While no one ever told me the proper networking etiquette, I have figured out what works well for me. For me, I think networking with contacts in one-on-one meetings has been the most successful versus true networking events. I am on the shorter side. So I feel that, combined with being a young working woman, I tend to get lost at these sorts of events even if I am screaming at the top of my lungs. What has been your experience?

When I began networking my senior year of college, it all started with my family and one question, “do you have people you think I should talk with as I start my job search?”. I was shocked with their response as they eagerly handed over their friends and colleagues contact information. Right away I started calling these people to set up informational interviews. Once I met with them, they soon were handing over their contacts too and the chain continued. My network was born.

Six years later as I find myself in transition, the first thing I did was export all my contacts from Outlook, sorted by location based on where I want to live and began setting up meetings again to reconnect and network. Just last week, during a networking phone call, this person suggested that I look through their LinkedIn profile, find connections that I was interested in and they would make an introduction. It was online networking at its finest. It blew me away.

Here is my “how to” guide on networking when in transition. All networking tips are good ones and what may work for me might not for others so please share in the comments section what works for you.

• Start by creating a list of your current contacts (Outlook, Friends, Family)
• Identify a region you want to live in, focus on those contacts first
• Start calling those people and let them know you want to get together for lunch or coffee*
• Research as much as you can about the person and company
• Look on their company careers page to see of they are hiring so you can inquire when you meet
• Follow up a day or so before, to confirm the meeting
• Prepare four to five questions you want to ask in the meeting
• Wear a business suit, even if you know the person you are meeting with wears jeans EVERYDAY
• In the meeting, be sure to ask the golden question “Do you have others you think I should connect with?”
• Let the meeting be more conversational, rather than stiff and rigid
• After the meeting send a thank you note to both the person who introduced your contact and the person you met with
• If they recommend you someone to follow up with or connect with, do so right way and then let them know the status of those next meetings

*I have made a rule to always call and never email when starting conversations with people. I think it shows motivation to pick up the phone and they hear that you are serious about getting together. It’s also a lot harder to say no over the phone too than in an email.

A Working Girl in Transition

I am a lot of things.

I am in my late 20’s. I am a marketing major. I am an accounting minor. I am a yogi. I am daughter/only child. I am a girlfriend. I am a dog mom. I am an achiever. I am a neat freak. I am always on time. I am an ice cream lover. And the list goes on…two of the most important things right now in my life are that: I am a working girl and I am in transition. There is so much to tell, but let me start with these for now…

My mother died when I was young, leaving my father to raise me. Because of the unique situation we were in, he played many roles in my upbringing. He has played father, mother, teacher, best friend, listener, motivator and my personal favorite, hero. My father didn’t run for the door. In fact, he slammed the door hard, locked it and made sure that he was going to be there for me no matter what. My father not only won kudos for being a hands-on single parent, but he is very successful within his profession as well. I strongly value his advice in my own career. I am sure I will share some of his words of wisdom from time to time.

I was lucky enough to grow up in a small mountain town where you leave your front door unlocked. We lived in this town a majority of my 18 years growing up. I graduated from a small private high school where four years of high school I played every sport imaginable. My father was of the belief that sports instilled many values such as work ethic, integrity, teamwork and discipline. Many of which still play an important role in my life today.

My story really starts when I left for college. I thought I was leaving home to move to the big bad city. I have since been reminded that there are no big cities in the state where I attended college. I became the typical freshman, spending more time perfecting my social life than perfecting my grades. By the time my first quarter was over and I returned home for the holidays my entire summer savings was hanging in my closet, right where Carrie Bradshaw would have liked it.

Spring of sophomore year I fell in love with my business classes and declared marketing as my major. Looking back on it now, are you ever really sure what you want to do with your life at 19? I have no regrets about the major I chose, but because it’s so broad, it left me wondering “What do I really want to do with my life”.

I spent summers interning within various marketing related companies: a marketing research firm, PR firm and in-house marketing at a private country club. By senior year, I still was asking myself that same question, so I devised a plan. I decided that I would spend my last spring break in a city of my choosing, conducting 30ish informational interviews in a variety of industries from companies small to large. I am certain my peers thought I had gone nutty since they were all off enjoying one final hurrah. When I returned to college for the final ten weeks of school, I set a goal for myself of becoming an Account Executive in an agency setting.

Four days prior to graduation, I was offered my first job as a marketing coordinator. It only took me a little over a year to be promoted to an Account Executive thus achieving a goal that I thought would take a lot longer. However, about a year after my promotion, I started my first “in transition” experience, realizing the importance of being close to my father (who had since relocated to another state) and began to put my wheels in motion. I felt very lucky because within a month or two of really looking, I landed a position in an industry that I felt I could have a long career in. And then the economy crashed.

I struggled for two years in this industry before realizing it was time to get out. I was once again in transition and started utilizing my network to make my next move. Just as luck would have it, I met up with one of my very closest friends who has just starting working for a company* where they were launching a new project and needed marketing support. I was quickly offered the position and it seemed like a perfect fit/dream job. I have been at this position for about two years now, but last spring began to experience the need for a new challenge and this last summer began my latest in transition as a working girl.

My purpose for wanting to be a part of this blog is to be able to share with you a point in my life where I feel my career is a tipping point. I am not the best writer in the world, but I do know that I have experiences to share that are similar to all of you. In this economy and job market, we are all in transition all the time, there are things we need to be doing constantly to be getting ahead even when we feel our own job is secure.

Please feel free to email me at any time at intransitionworkinggirl@gmail.com. I would love to hear from others who are in transition! Thank for reading and I look forward to taking this journey with you.

*I still work at this company right now and since I am in transition feel it’s important for myself to keep this in disguise. I do have lots of great stories. As soon as am no longer in transition, I will share more about the position I currently hold. Thank you for understanding!