Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Feeling a bit like a home-schooled jungle freak

These days, I can totally relate to Cady Heron in Mean Girls. You know, when she’s brand new to her school and feels totally awkward. Certainly not when she gets all skankalicious and Regina George-like.

When it comes to my job, I’m the new kid in school. Though I haven’t had to eat my lunch in a bathroom stall (thank goodness), I have felt awkward more than a few times. I knew when I started that it would take awhile to fit in and find my niche. In fact, they say it takes six months to really feel settled. One down. Five more to go. Yikes.

But with this job, my transition seems to be a bit more hostile than I expected. The reason? My company does the majority of their hiring from within. So when they hire someone from the outside, it sometimes ruffles a few feathers. And with my particular position, a lot of inside people really wanted it.

When I found that out, I was really proud of myself. Until my coworker informed me that the internal people who interviewed for my job were NOT happy they chose an outsider. I went from feeling elated to deflated in about a microsecond.

And she wasn’t kidding. There is literally a group of people, who seem to always travel in a giant pack, that wanted my job. And every time I see them, I feel so uncomfortable. Not that we’ve ever actually met. They just like to stare at me. Last week when I was brainstorming with coworkers in the cafeteria, the group came in and sat at a table not far from me. After a few minutes, they all turned and stared at me. Just stared. It was bizarre. It only lasted a second, but it was enough to set my cheeks ablaze and make me squirm with nerves.

Unfortunately, they’re not the only ones. There’s this one girl I’ve been in a lot of meetings with lately and I swear, when I’m looking the other way, I can feel her eyes fixed on me, sending razor sharp mental daggers my way. I’ve tried to ignore it, chalking it up to an unfriendly personality. Until yesterday. That’s when I found out that she wanted my job. A lot. And she was not happy that she didn’t get it.

It’s so awkward. And yes, if the roles were reversed, I might be frustrated, too. But I certainly wouldn’t be shooting daggers. I’m not that type of girl. Luckily I get along really well with everyone on my team. They tell me to brush off the stares, which I do. I just hate confrontation. And as much as I don’t want to admit it, I really hate when people don’t like me. Especially if it’s for a dumb reason.

I’m extremely appreciative that I got the job. I love it so far, and I feel so lucky that they chose me. So for now, I’m just going to focus on enjoying the ride and try to ignore their long, lingering looks. They’ll get over it eventually. And in the immortal words of the random crying girl from Mean Girls, “I wish I could bake a cake full of rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy.” That would be lovely.

14 comments:

Monica said...

Hang in there, Advertising Working Girl! Sorry to hear your transition has been a little awkward but never has there been a better time to make this cake: http://bit.ly/RAnTD . Seriously, it's time for a rainbow cake! :)

Practically Perfect... said...

Ooh, I'm so sorry to hear that! Fitting in at a new job is always hard, but it's even worse when people seem against you from the start :-( Hang in there - you're smart and talented, and they obviously picked the best person for the job!

Romantic Comedee said...

I had an incredibly frustrating day, myself. I freelance and the website through which I receive 90% of my assignments was down today. So, I couldn't get anything done. I wanted to scream. Instead, I baked cookies (and broke a cabinet door in the process). Keep smiling. Those people will find someone else to hate soon enough and you'll still be a fabulous Ad Working Girl!

tris1978ton said...

Don't worry about those jealous people. You got your job for a reason. Like you said, just focus on the job itself and not those dagger eyes.

Nik said...

You SHOULD be very proud of yourself for landing such a highly sought after position! I know it's easy to say, but don't let 'em bring ya down! As soon as they see you for you, they will get over the "she got my position" blues. And for the ones who don't . . . who cares!!!

Much love chica!!
Nik

Maddy said...

Sorry to hear that you're having a rough time. When I first started my current position, I also felt like the outsider. After a while, I had to accept that I would never be best buds with some of the people at work.But that's ok with me. If anything, it's helped me focus and be more productive at work. Don't feel lucky to have received this position, you obviously earned it!! And don't let anyone make you feel otherwise :)

Mrs Soup said...

I totally understand where you are coming from. It's horrible. So so sad. And frustrating.

But show that you are awesome and shine in the position and you will win them over. They may never be your best friends, but they can still accept you as not leaving.

Ms. Attitude said...

Hang in there! Remember, there was a reason you got the job and not them. After 6 months, if things haven't changed, I would mention something to them and see if you guys can get along.

Jessie said...

wow is your job full of fifth graders?! hoepfully they will all grow up soon!

Girl About Business said...

I understand exactly where you're coming from about being bothered when people don't like you for dumb reasons. But we have to realize that there will ALWAYS be people in the world like that, and the best thing to do is kill them with kindness. When they are snarling at you, smile and wave. When they are having a conversation, invite yourself in. Continue to be cordial and walk around with your head up. Even if they don't like you for getting the position, they will respect you :-)

Hope this helps!

Maggie said...

I completely understand where you're coming from. I will have been at my job now for two years in April and I still feel like one person I work with is not exactly happy I'm there. Fortunately for me, my boss and immediate co-worker are happy with the choice that was made.

Hang in there! You'll show them in no time why you got the job over them.

Ellen said...

Just like Rick Ross says, "I don't give a f%&*@ what a hater's gotta say." And you shouldn't either. Congrats on the job! Can I be your coffee bitch? ;)

http://www.firednfabulous.blogspot.com/

The Awkward Type said...

sounds ruff... There are a couple of people who don't like me at my job, (for no reason other than I refuse to join in there complain about everything group). I am finding that walking in every morning and saying Hello, Good morning, etc. is wearing there hatred down. Its difficult to hate someone whos always so nice. I also tried to bump into a particular person and offered to help with a project, that turned her attitude as well! Good luck! Just remember you deserve that job!

prashant said...

they obviously picked the best person for the job!

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