It's time that I share with you all a big part of who I am. I think we've known each other long enough at this point, don't you think? You all know that I'm a Lawyer Working Girl, but what I haven't shared thus far is that I am a Single Lawyer Working Girl. Yes, Working Girls, I am Single. Now, I know you're probably thinking, "So what? So am I." Well, I feel like it's a big part of who I am because I've been single most of my Working Girl life and I've almost gotten to the point where I can't imagine it any other way.
Don't get me wrong. I do love men. While I do enjoy my singleness, I do desire the companionship of a man (in fact, I'm currently seeing one). But I think I've gotten so used to it just being me that I wonder "Would I like something or someone interrupting my groove?" I'm used to coming to a quiet home, my home, and having my space and my me time after a day at work that I wonder how I will handle having to share my home with someone else.
But then I think back to Sex And The City and I think, I hope, that I'm like Carrie. Do you remember the episode where she comes home and Aidan is full of questions about how her day went? And she finally tells him to give her time when she gets home before getting all in her face (Ok, she didn't say it exactly like that, but you know what I mean). Well, a few seconds after she walks in her room, sits on her bed, and gathers herself, she goes back in the living room, climbs in his lap, and asks him what he's doing. See, I already know that the Carrie in the first part of that scene will be me. I will need some time to breath and collect myself when I first get home from work. I'm hoping, and honestly I really think that I will be like the Carrie in the last part of that scene. The one who will eventually want to snuggle up to my man and who will be happy that he's there sharing my home, our home. I just think that I will need a bit of a time to get used to the idea.
Ok, so then once I get past that sharing my space thing, I start to think, "Is he going to expect me to cook after I've worked a 10 hour day?" It's just me and I rarely cook for myself when I get home after a long day at work, so I know I won't have the energy to cook for me plus one. Maybe I'll be lucky enough to get that man who will want to cook for me.
And THEN, I start to think, "Oh.Em.Gee. Kids." Will he want kids? Will I want kids? Will I be expected to work a 10 hour day and come home and cook for Me & He Plus Three? Who has that kind of energy? All I know is that when I come home now to my empty home after work, I am usually exhausted. Add a man, kids, and maybe a pet and I just don't know how I would do it all. I will no longer be able to come home, plop on my couch, doze off, eat a bowl of cereal for dinner, watch Real Housewives, and doze off again. I would have to come home, prepare a healthy dinner, help with homework, spend quality family time together, put kids to bed, deal with any household tasks (pay bills, create schedules, clean, etc), have some us time with my husband, and then have my me time. (Wow, I got tired just typing all of that.) How do you Working Girls with children, and particularly you Single Mother Working Girls, do it all?? And am I the only Single Working Girl who has thought about this? (Why I'm even thinking about any of this is beyond me. You would think I'm on the cusp of becoming a Married Working Girl. Not even close.)