Do you ever feel like you're being a huge annoyance to the people you work with? Like you're stalking people via email? It's the story of my life recently and I always feel bad about it.
At work, this never used to be a problem. Maybe because I was at my last job for so long that I was very comfortable. I knew my role and the roles of the people I worked with. Sure, every now and then an email started with "apologies for..." but everyone does that. Right?!
Lately, I feel like I'm always apologizing. I've been working on a big project in an area that is new to me. There have been a lot of growing pains. A lot. I've been apologizing to the vendor who is executing the day-to-day of the project, the internal people in my company of whom I've asked dozens of questions, my co-workers, my boss.
There is no reason for me to be apologizing. Especially to the vendor working on the project. The vendor is working for me and I might be a PIA but isn't that pretty much a pre-req for being the client?
This was something that came up at my last job. Working on events, you sometimes have to be a bit stern and harsh with the vendors you're working with. It's something I've always had a problem with. Maybe it's because I like being liked or don't want to be a bitch or that I let sympathy take over.
Too often I put myself in the vendors' shoes and think "they are working really hard, if it were me I'd want the client to be nice to me." But I should be thinking "if I were in their shoes, I'd be doing x, y and z to make this perfect for my client." Over time, I think, I hope, I've gotten a bit better (and I definitely still have some room for improvement).
For last week or so I've stopped myself every time I've typed "I'm sorry" or "apologies for" because really, I'm not sorry. I'm not sorry I didn't get to your email yesterday, I was swamped and it wasn't a priority. I'm not sorry I'm following up for the third time on something that should have been completed by now.
I still have to make a conscious effort not to apologize, but hopefully, I'm on the right track.